Tuesday, June 24, 2008

all by myself....

well after I got the news that the headstone was at our spot....I needed to stop and see it for myself.......I feel a big relief that I didn't have to cause a big stink over this....cause if you know me...I don't like causing stinks....but I will if I have to...but i really don't want to....but it's there....needs a little extra grass seed around there....... well both girls canceled out on going to the balloon release with me....I guess that's good that they're busy....., but the funeral home only does it once a year...so I wanted to still go.....it was really beautiful...the only hard part was that we sat in the room where ed was shown....so I started to hyperventilate a little when they opened the doors....but pulled my big girl panties up (as jeniece would say) and headed in....it's funny how small the room seemed....at the funeral...it felt like this huge...gigantic room...but now it's so small...I kept a picture of him in my hands the entire time, they said some beautiful words, played a couple tear jearking songs....and then we all wrote a message on a note card.....and picked out a balloon....
I was eyeing up the WM green one....and then I picked 2 for the girls.....and we all headed outside to let them go.....it was thundering....and started to sprinkle when we walked outside.....


but we just walked out and let them go.....they all stuck together....I guess going to the same place...LOL!!!

and of course I was the only one with a camera.....am I weird??? Is that not a beautiful sight.....that the girls will enjoy seeing.......when they're grown...




7 comments:

Anonymous said...

How beautiful! I am so glad you pulled up your big girl panties and did it!

Jeniece

Anonymous said...

I did one of these balloon releases at a grief meeting with Carla, Tina and the boys when Al passed away. I think they are so beautiful and I am glad you took your camera. Listen to jeniece, that is why I call her the teacher. Love you tracy(ha ha)and I think I understand your pain at least some of it as everyone is different. Love kathy

Anonymous said...

your not weird...just a scrappin fool....love the photo's Sandi

Anonymous said...

Staci, beautiful pictures. I love that you chose WM green. I think you need to scrap that fact right there. I'm so amazed with your strength, especially going alone to this. I heard a new song by Staind today and the line "the weak become strong" made me think of you. Not that you were weak before...but you have taken on so much more...you are one rockin' mama!!
Alison

Anonymous said...

PS...
Noticed I'm still not #1...KC and Renee ahead of me. Sniff, off to cry myself to sleep...

~Sasha Farina~ said...

that is so beautiful Staci! *hugs*

Anonymous said...

Hey, I didn't write that comment about being #1! I smell a rat...and I think it's name is Jendell...

Alison